My Mother's Day Gift to Me: A Picnic in the Park with the "Girls"

After church this morning, I intended to take a community walk. I was going to replace my brown open-toe heels for some sneakers and get familiar with my neighborhood as I worked my leg muscles. While preparing to get my praise on, my sorority sister, Omena, texted me and invited me to a picnic in the partk. Perfect timing, I thought. I hadn't got together with a group of my girls in over a decade -- in fact, before I had Lady Clara. Oh, I was way overdo. Then I thought about my vision board. On it, was a picture of me and several woman sitting on a blanket in Central Park holding our glasses in the air, smiling real hard. I was excited about the forthcoming connection.

I went to the store and purchased some purple grapes, strawberries, Snack Wells white fudge drizzled caramel popcorn and Ocean Spray cranberry juice. My mom created a fruit salad and I packed all of the delicious and healthy goodies into a lime green insulated picnic basket that I purchased a year ago and was using for the first time today.

I kissed the kids and made my way to Prospect Park in Brooklyn, NY. When I got there, I called up Omena and she guided me to the blankets where women sat waiting to greet the next mommy -- ME! We introduced ourselves to each and got busy connecting as women are so natural with doing. The weather was nice and more so it made for an extra pleasant experience.

I discovered that Melonie was a Fashion Institute of Technology graduate and talented wardrobe stylist with a deep desire to work with helping women who have been battered and abused as well as women living in shelters to feel good about themselves from the inside and out through fashion styling. I was awe inspired by Gina, who sat directly beside me. She is currently studying Chinese medicine, mades her own body butters and oils through her company called Ommmango Wellness Holisitic Healing, is a massage therapist and a chef. She made some Sorrell that was sweet and oh-so tasty! Then, there was Kim. She possesed a sweet spirit and had a beautiful smile. She illuminated with happiness. I met another sistah who is a dancer and is preparing for her July wedding (congrats!) to a wonderful man and fellow writer. We talked about youth empowerment.

While eating all of the wonderfully healthy foods, we had "girl talk" and strategized on ways that we can work together. As a result, we will be meeting up every Sunday now and once a month we will participate in an initiative that Omena calls "The Riding for Moms Campaign." She wants moms to be able to get together to ride their bikes to not only get fit but to begin positive dialogues and build a supportive community amongs each other. Out of our get-gether also came the idea for a pampering party featuring mini massages, healthy food and light entertainment as well as a workshop I will be leading called "Loving Yourself Inside and Out."

I really needed today. I just reminded me that I must make time to bond with "the girls" on a regular basis. I need it for my spirit and my growth. It's amazing the things can get accomplished and the good feeling you feel when you get together with women who love life and have purpose and passion.

We closed out our day by hugging each other and promising to follow up on all that we talked about.I walked away inspired and loved. I made new friends, created new concepts and ate some yummy food.

Thanks Soror Omena for inviting me to fellowship with "the girls." I thank myself for investing in me.

Happy Mother's Day!

Until I write you next... I'm just living the solo mommy life.

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff

PS: For daily updates on what I'm up to, follow me on twitter at: www.twitter.com/solomommy.

Get in Shape, Girl -- With Zumba!

This past Tuesday night, I got my workout on! I, along with Lady Clara and Sir Isaac, attended a Zumba class held in a dance studio at the Restoration building in Bedstuy Brooklyn. From the start of the hour-long class to its conclusion, personal fitness trainer and Zumba dance instructor Carolina Walickihas us in motion with Latin, hip hop and Indian tunes. I wwas stepping, winding and twisting away -- non stop! It felt good, too.

As I followed Carolina while watching myself in the mirror, I could feel my body toning up even more. And, how could this not be the case?! After all, Carolina had instructed me and my workout mates with fun but concentrated moves. I was working my abs, arms, thighs, hips and all.

In between songs, I took in some much needed H2O (and boy oh boy did it taste refreshing!). I sipped then stepped. In addition to getting in a workout routine, attending the Zumba class offered fellowship among women. We worked out real hard and laughed all the while. Our smiles and eyes communicated that we were having a great time working out together. We encouraged each other to keep moving and gave each other a signal on the correct turn to make. It was a blessed workout session.

I truly felt charged afterward. I shared with my workout sistahs after class was over. They shared back on the importance of being there. Zumba class with Carolina meets every Tuesday from 7:30 to 8:30 pm. I'll be back. My children will be joining me (Oh yes, that's the other benefit. I can work out with my tweens.)

Lady Clara recorded the workout session so stay tuned to www.youtube.com/powerhouseforever for the video posting. I must say... I got my workout on!

Make the time to workout. It's good for your body as well as your spirit. So go ahead, get in shape girl!

Until I write you next... I'm just living the solo mommy life!

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff
www.livingthesolomommylife.blogspot.com

Lady Clara "BROUGHT IT" at The Oratory Contest!

I am so proud of Lady Clara. Today, she participated in her school's 3rd Annual Oratory Contest (and her first-ever speech competition). Lady Clara was the lone fourth grader amongst four fifth graders but that didn't stress her. Her godmommy, Kamille E. Wright, and I, prepped her beforehand on how to deliver or rather "BRING IT" when she hits the stage.

When Ms. Lord, Lady Clara's speech coach, called her name first to come to the stage and recite her speech, the auditorium went wild with cheers and claps. She took the name, stood up tall and proud, and then, she said, "I will be reciting the eulogy of Rosa Parks delivered by Oprah Winfrey on October 31, 2005..."

From the first word to the last, she was poised, gave constant eye contest, paused in the right places and spoke with conviction. My daughter looked natural on stage. Visions of future speeches danced in my head.

When Lady Clara concluded her speech -- which was a flawless delivery -- she thanked the audience and proceeded to leave the stage. Again, she received applauses and praises. I overheard one of the judges say that she did an incredible job. I thanked Jesus out loud. I was thankful because I know the road I have traveled to get Lady Clara to this point of being confortable and confident to stand before a packed room of people to speak.

My spirit was full and my heart filled with gratitude. After the four judges deliberated, they announced the overall winner (who will go on to compete against students from other schools) and the second, third and fourth place winners.

Ms. Lord announced that Lady Clara had tied for second place! Yes! She received her school certificate and later on receive her certificate from The Adelaide L. Sandord Institute, which is the institution that created this oratory competition. I recorded her speech and took pictures of her. This opens up a whole new world for Lady Clara. This is perfect timing, too, because she has expressed interest in broadcast journalism and already has her own news show, "Kids Witness News."

There was nothing more important than being at school today to see Lady Clara step into her power. I encourage you -- my single mom sistahs -- to be there to support your children in school and in their extracurricular activities as much is possible. I know that being in the audience made a difference to her. Being there made a differnce for me as well.

So, congrats to my first born... You did well Lady Clara. So much more is definitely on the horizon!

Until I write you next... I'm just living the solo mommy life.

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff

Take Care of You!

I had a health scare yesterday. After returning from using the ladies room, I suddenly felt extruciating pain in my stomach and pelvic area. The pain was so intense that I couldn't move. I stood still, slightly bent over, in the parent coordinator's room at my children's school. I thought the pain would subside with seconds, but those seconds turned into many minutes.

After about 15 minutes of standing up, I barely made it to sit down. Sitting down was just as painful. Cupping my stomach and rubbing it for some relief, I felt sharp pains shooting throughout my body. It hurt like heck. When I tried to get up, I couldn't move (again). The pain was so severe. It felt like the pain a women experiences after during and after giving birth. I couldn't escape it. Breathing exercises didn't hurt. That just set off the pain even more.

At this point, it was about 6:30 pm and Ms. Ayers (the school's parent coordinator) was about to leave for the day. When I arose, I came to another stand still. I couldn't take another step. I hunched over and began crying. Ms. Ayers instructed Lady Clara and Sir Isaac to pack up my stuff. She and her friend, Hutch, decided that they were going to take us home. They saw that I was in no condition to get on the bus.

It was painful getting in Hutch's car as well as getting out. In fact, he had to help me get out of the car and walk me to my door. Going up the steps was a task. I took baby steps. Since I couldn't stand up too long, I ordered food for me and the children. Then, I took a nice hot shower and got in bed for the rest of the night. Lady Clara and Sir Isaac rubbed my feet and massaged my head.

What was the source of my pain? Well, I didn't eat all day. I didn't drink any water all day (FYI: All I had was some hot chocolate in the morning before heading out to take the children to school). I held my urine for three hours -- even though I had access to a bathroom -- because I was focused on the projects I was working at the computer.

I did a total disservice to my body and I paid a painful price. My message to you? Take care of your body or it will shut down on you-- BIG TIME. Don't skip any meals. Drink H2O throughout the day. When you gotta go... GO! I don't plan on revisiting this lesson. I promise you and me!

I want to give a super special shout out to Ms. Ayers and Hutch for taking me and the children home. May God bless you for taking care of one of his own.

To my darling angels, I say thank you for taking care of mommy. I love you two so much!

Until the next time I write you.... I'm just living the solo mommy life.

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff
http://livingthesolomommylife.blogspot.com

I'm Creating Strategic Plans for 2011

I have a lot of projects that I desire to complete in 2011. One of the things that I did to set myself up for success going into 2011 was to attend a teleconference on Wednesday, December 22, 2010, offered by Andrew Morrison of Small Business Camp. The discussion topic was appropriately entitled, “Creating Strategic Plans for the New Year.”

Equipped with my trusty laptop (Betsy), I got busy taking notes. I discovered many strategies from this hour and a half-long session that will enable me to realize my plans. Here, I will detail the points and how I plan to apply them to my respective projects not now, but RIGHT NOW:

1. Get in the habit of speaking less and communicating more. I learned from Andrew that you don’t want to half-talk who you are and what you do. You must be clear about what you want to convey and deliver it in a manner that will compel people to become not only interested in what you do but ready to help you or connect you with someone who can assist you. Today, this is my introduction to who I am… “Hello, my name is Feona Sharhran Huff. I am the Founder & CEO of Powerhouse Media Group, a full-service agency that produces publications and events that inspire, empower and celebrate women, single mothers, and youth.” Hopefully, you don’t see my introduction as some long and drawn out speech but something that’s concise yet speaks volumes to the services that my company offers.

2. In event planning, minimize your costs. I dream big when it comes to planning events. However, as I plan for Solo Mommy Magazine’s “Special Tribute to SOLO Daddies,” for example, I am looking at how I can be financially savvy with my expenditures for this June 2011 event. I plan to solicit volunteers and seek out interns who can receive college credit for their services. I am entertaining the idea of having the event at my church. As a member, I would get a discount. And, if you didn’t know it, the venue is ALWAYS the most costly item amongst what you have to dish out for your event. I’m also planning to seek out sponsorships and partnerships.

3. Who else in your industry is making money? There are several people in the industries of event planning, magazine publishing and children’s book writing that I am reading up on. They are monetarily successful at what they do. I know that I can learn from them so I can increase my wealth to be able to do more of what I love.

4. Conduct free workshops and sell your book. Throughout the course of 2011, I will be charging for some workshops and offering others for free. However, at both, I will be selling my books. These are opportune times to get my books out to the masses as oppose to walking the streets and trying to sell to one customer at a time. At my workshops, I will have the potential customers. All I need to do is have the books available for purchase. On Sunday, January 30, 2011, I will be conducting my Mirror Mirror self-esteem workshop for Black tween girls (ages 7 to 12) from 3 to 6 pm at True South Books (492 Nostrand Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11216). I will also be selling, Mirror Mirror: An Empowerment Book for Black Girls. Who knows… I may have parents to purchase books for not only their daughters but their nieces, students and neighbors as well!

5. Understand who is your customer. As the publisher of Solo Mommy Magazine, it is important to know and understand who my readers are. In 2011, it is my priority to take surveys as well as do more fellowshipping with these single moms (through events such as “Girl Get-Togethers” and “Movies & a Conversation”), to get a better understanding of who they and what they need. This will allow me to better serve them through the magazine and in the events that I produce for them.

6. Don’t beat yourself up. Be gentle. Ask yourself what you learned from your experiences. I am very hard on myself when it comes to producing successful projects and events. When I don’t feel like enough people showed up or I didn’t meet my financial mark, I can really go in on myself. In the new year, however, I’m going to deal with myself differently. The first thing I will do is acknowledge what I did well. Then, I will access what didn’t go so well and look at what I can do better the next time. Also, I will consider what I learned. Will it be that I should have had a back up speaker? Or, that I needed to plan for attendance cancellations? Whatever it is, I will embrace it because it will only make my planning better for the next event.

7. Find a media personality/celebrity that matches your brand. I have identified several figures in the media and entertainment fields who perfectly suit the mission of Solo Mommy Magazine and the workshops I conduct to empower tween and teen girls. I have already reached out to one tween hip-hop artist whose mother is very interested in having her daughter make a special appearance at my Mirror Mirror workshop in January. The 11-year-old rising star is bold, confident and has a high self-esteem. She is the epitome of the empowered young girl that I write about in my book. Her involvement would bring an increased awareness to my cause.

8. Document your success. By keeping a detailed account of the work I have done, this will allow others to see in black-n-white (or through photos) exactly what I’ve accomplished. Currently, I have binders for Powerhouse and Solo Mommy activities. Every time I conduct a workshop, I place the flier in the binder along with photos taken at the event and testimonials/feedback I’ve received. And, if there have been any media write-ups, I include those as well. When I go to make presentations, my binders speak volumes as to my success. As the saying goes… “pictures don’t lie!”

I hope that by me sharing the ways in which I plan on having a productive 2011, you will embrace the strategies I gathered from Andrew’s teleconference and implement them for your particular projects. Happy strategizing!

We're Chillin' at My Cousin's Place

After visiting Lady Clara's BFF, Princess Nieema, the Huffsters had plans to go to a vegan cafe that we frequent. But, from where we were -- and with no bus in sight to venture some 20 minutes away -- we optetd to stay close to the C Train so that we could at least hop on it and head back home. We were headed to Sir Isaac's favorite french frie spot when he noticed a sign in a cafe's window that promoted Free Wifi.

Sir Isaac immediately stopped, tapped on the window -- getting the attention of the man sitting at the table near the window -- and shouted, "Do you have free Wifi?" The man shook his head up and down. Next thing I know, we were walking in. A gentleman was at the counter getting his order of homemade chilli. Did you say homemade chilli? Well, I was sold! I ordered a $4 bowl with some rice and got the children at chicken cutlas hero sandwich, along with some snapple drinks.

The man from the window -- who turned out to be the cafe's co-owner, Frank - set us up in the back of the recently opened soup and sandwich eatery. As Karen made our food and the children logged on for free Wifi, Frank and I conversed. I already knew in my mind -- based on my experience thus far -- that I'd be coming back to chill at my cousin's place. No, I didn't find out by chance that Frank and I are related. That's the name of the establishment. But, you know what? It feels like a family spot. We're chillin' like we're at a family member's house. And, that is refreshing. It's so important to find a place where you can dine in peace. And, for me... get a little (okay... A LOT) of work done on the laptop.

Oh, yes... My Cousin's Place is going to be a regular spot for my family. If you want try it out for yourself, come on down to: 100 Kingston Avenue, Brookly, NY (between Bergen St and Dean Street). Call them up at (718) 363-3111 to see what's on the menu as they try to serve three new soups a week.

Until I write you next... I'm just living the solo mommy life.

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff
http://livingthesolomommylife.blogspot.com

Change IS Good!

For the longest, I have wanted to rock a mohawk hairdo. However, because I am not one to follow everyone elses styling lead, I decided to lay low on the hairstyle change. Besides, I didn't know how it would look on me. I am a firm believer that not everything looks good on everybody.

However (BIG SMILE)... I decided to let my dear friend, Queen, give me a new look about a month ago. Up until then, I was growing my hair out while keeping it in a funky curly fro thanks to the makers of Gummy Gel! After she washed, then flat ironed my hair, I took a look in the mirror and was absolutely amazed. My hair was long and thick. "Wow," I said to myself. "You actually let you hair grow to this lenght. Good going, Feona!"

Then, Queen proceeded to braid my hair. After two hours of sitting still on a makeshift chair, she had completed doing designs on both sides of my head. All that was left was the middle. "Okay, so what do you want me to do," she asked. "I want to rock a mohawk," I exclaimed without hesitation. So, she curled then spiked the hair that was left out. I went back to the mirror and was pleasantly pleased.

I immediately felt differently with my new 'do. While I've always fancied my curly fro, the change in style was a smart move. It's funny because one of Lady Clara's classmates called me Willow (FYI: actress Jada Pinkett Smith's daughter) the next day when she saw the transformation of my hair. I couldn't do anything but flash my signature koolaide smile. Like the hook to the tween's song goes, "I whip my hair!" A longtime friend from my hometown likened me to my fave R&B singer, Mary J. Blige. That was indeed a compliment because the mohawk she (and I) wear is so sassy. And, sassy... I AM! When I went in my neighborhood grocery store that I shop in practically EVERYDAY, the store manager didn't recognize me. He apologized when I said who i was after he replied to my evening greeting a bit differently than usual. I didn't take offense, though. My new 'do was doing something for me. It was changing me.

I embraced the changing of my hair style. I felt an extra pep in my step. I smiled even deeper. I layed on the gloss just a tad bit more (Oh yes... my lipgloss WAS poppin'!). I felt great.

And, you see.... that's what change is suppose to make you feel. While I focused on the change of my hairdo, this mindset applies to the changes that take place in our lives as well. Sometimes we don't want change because we think it's going to mess up our entire M.O. But, that's quite the contrary. Change actually exhances how you do things and empowers you to try even new routes.

So, the next time change knocks at your door (or has a conversation with your hair stylist!), give it a hug and rock it. I embraced some more change even today and it's truly ALL GOOD.

Until I write you next... I'm just living the solo mommy life.

Love you!

Feona Sharhran Huff
http://livingthesolomommylife.blogspot.com